I've been in a kind of slump lately
between finals and getting ready to be home for a month, life has been a whirlwind lately. To add to that, I've had my own form of self-induced stress about the most ridiculous things like relationships, food/ weight, and greek life. Yes, believe it or not I am a crazy over-thinker who reacts to stress by... putting myself under more stress.
I guess this tactic isn't all bad, since my stress over the stupid stuff seems (in my mind) like a bigger deal than the pending exams, so studying is actually a "distraction" and a way to quit thinking about it. Because, if I put my phone on Do Not Disturb, then I won't have to constantly wonder if I'm getting a text- it wouldn't buzz anyways. If I study really hard I'll do well on my exams- something to "brag" about if I go through recruitment again. But, as soon as I put the books down for a break, I'm back to over-thinking. I'm back to measuring whether or not I'm cute based on the number of Instagram likes or comments. I'm back to falling into a Country music- induced depression.
and through this vicious cycle, I'm forgetting to think beyond this moment
I was taking a much-needed study break when I came across this quote on Pinterest. And I remembered that in one week, I'll be home for a month. I'll have my first semester behind me, and many more ahead. And yes, right now I have about a million and two thoughts zipping around my mind at a speed too high for me to register. Academic stress mixed with personal mixed with everything in else is a lot, and I have yet to find a way to quiet my mind. But I need to keep reminding myself that my worrying and over-thinking isn't doing anything to help me right now. There is always something wonderful in the future-
no matter how rough the present or uncertain the future